I am exhausted... its currently tuesday late evening and I've just gotten home from a quick business trip to Stamford, CT for another gig. This is proving to be a very difficult week to get through and I think it only bodes of what the next couple of months are going to be like. Between Sunday September 19th - November 19th I will be home for exactly 20 days. Putting me out of town for 40 of the next 60 days. Thats a lot. And each of those trips requires pre production work and paperwork and phone calls and design work. The stress of it all is starting to add up. But if all goes to plan this chunk of shows could be my last hurrah. So I just need to suffer through this batch, hold myself to the same high standard of work I always do, and get it done. Come home with a bunch of money in the bank, start my tri bike fund, and move towards finding new work in 2011. I've had it with life on the road. I have lost all love for it.
On top of all of this my body is still not recovering well from the TDD. Actually I shouldn't really blame the TDD. Its my own dumb fault for racing a week after the FIRM when I know better. I know I don't recover that quickly from an effort that hard. I was recovering just fine from the FIRM till I packed the TDD on top of it. So now I deserve all the calf pain, and tight hamstrings, and whatever the hec is wrong with my heel but seems to be getting better slightly. And who knows what racing the AMICA will do this weekend. I'm hoping that by then the residual effects of the FIRM will be gone at least and I'll just be dealing with feeling a bit run down by the end of the season. I've done exactly ZERO training since the TDD. I just haven't had the energy, and my legs haven't felt up to it. That and to be honest the work stress has been so intense this week its been difficult to think about training.
Tomorrow morning though I'm going to go for a ride and tomorrow night I'll go for an easy run. I'm kind of hoping tomorrow's ride turns into a hard one. I have a lot on my mind right now and I need to channel all this frustration into the pedals for a while and burn some of it off. Its building up quite a bit and I need to put a stop to that. Theres also been a few kinks in some personal relationships of mine this week that I need to process through and those things are always done best for me when excercising. So hopefully my legs are up to hammering away tomorrow for a bit.
I really need tomorrow to be a good day. The last two days have just plain and simply not been good days. This week is hard to deal with for me. I've been on such a high lately with the training and the great race at the FIRM and this week feels like such a low so far. Its off to a very bad start. So I hope that I manage to have a great ride tomorrow morning to start to turn things around... a productive workday where I can change the momentum of this project that only seems to want to spiral downward, and then have a great run with someone I've been looking forward to getting to run and talk to.
I was reading the Tri-NE forums on the drive home as I was stuck in traffic and not moving. Lots of folks are off for a long run on the TT course on Saturday. I would really like to go and join them after the Amica sprint but something tells me my legs won't be up for that the way things are going. I guess we'll see though. It would be nice to get a long run in. Both for my mind and to kick start marathon training. So I'll keep it in the back of my mind.
Ok... time for bed.
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